few more pics from our day at April and Kaylee's

Really?? let them finger paint?

We spent the day with my friend April and daughter Kaylee last week and decided to get adventurous! Her daughter has painted before but it was Lilly and Asher's first time. So April taped a big brown piece of paper to her wall and we just let them go. I was a bit nervous letting them do this in my friends house, now being at home and making a mess is one thing! Thankfully they were washable paints! I really didn't know how they would do or if they would like getting their hands all messy, but they loved it. Lilly especially. It was so fun watching them be creative and so excited. Asher did his hand prints all by himself, it was so cute! April and I decided we need to get together at least once a week and let the kids be creative and do a craft. I only got a few pictures of little Kaylee, poor girl, she ended up getting sick the next day along with mommy. I love watching the babies experience something new, it amazes me how fast they are growing and changing. Makes me want to stop time for a while. Here are a few pictures of our day with April and Kaylee...hope you two are feeling better!!

...some random thoughts because it's really late!

Lately I often find myself reading blogs really late at night. I love to read them but sometimes wonder how on earth people find the time to have such amazing, detailed blogs! I'm a bit jealous!! Lately my blog searches have been all about photography. It can be a bit overwhelming trying to take it all in. These blogs I have found have so much information on them and I desperately want to learn it all! My biggest thing right now is finding the time to do it all. I want to know the secret to taking care of twin two year olds all day, cleaning the house, cooking, checking my facebook, blogging, reading blogs, mastering photography, oh and did I mention taking care of myself some where in there? Fitting a shower in or even getting out of my pj's has turned into quite the luxury. I know others find the time to do all of this some how but I am having trouble and it's frustrating! Don't get me wrong I don't hate staying in my pj's all day...mmmm maybe not just every day! I find some blogs that are so fascinating, it almost seems like they would have to spend half of their day (everyday) blogging because there is so much information on them, not to mention the fact that they look amazing! I don't really want to be up at 1am catching up on some of my favorites or trying to type up a half way interesting blog of my own, but that is when I find a moment in my day to do it. Maybe I'm just not managing my time well or maybe it's because I have twin two year olds that demand my attention pretty much all day except for the hour and a half nap (I hope) they take. I could blog then or read blogs or practice my photography or clean the house or take a shower, or read a few chapters in the stack of books on my table I haven't gotten to... How do you fit it all in? What is the secret? Is anyone else as overwhelmed as I am? Ok....all that to say....while I was reading a blog this evening (well 12:30am) I found some really cool actions for photoshop and thought I would post a few pictures that I tried it out on of Lilly and Asher. The name suites it well....vintage. Isn't it cool? ok...no blog reading for me tonight, too tired.

I am determined

So lately I have been getting a bit discouraged about photography. Just when I think I am doing "ok" and maybe getting better, I see some really awesome photos others have taken. Instead of getting discouraged, I know I need to let it inspire me. I have a huge passion for photography at the same time a fear of not being good enough so it makes me hold back. I do have much more to learn about this art and am excited yet overwhelmed. I get plenty of encouragement from my darling husband and lots of compliments from family and friends though, so that's good thing. Thanks guys! ...I want to capture beautiful, interesting images for a living. That is my hearts desire, now if only my brain would catch up and help me understand all the technical stuff I might just take an amazing picture...in my eyes.

Amazing people...

My friend April had told me about this couple's blog that writes your babies name, that has gone to be with the Lord, in the sand at sunset and then takes a picture and sends it to you. She recently did my friends baby twins Erin and Tyler. I just spent the last 15-20 min. reading her blog and crying and hurting so much for parents that have lost a child. It is truly amazing, the strength they have. What this couple is doing to help other couples going thru the same thing is such a blessing. I can't imagine the grieving you go threw after loosing your baby and at first I was saying to myself, I don't even know where you would find the strength to go on and then I read this mother's story and thru my tears and heartache for her, she reminded me that God truly is amazing and can bring you thru anything "Although sorrow holds my hand and suffering sings me songs, when I close my eyes I know to whom I belong, who makes me strong".

I added the link to my blog so go and check it out. I hope it blesses you the way it did me! It's the one called "Name in the Sand".

Asher- fortunate; blessed, happy...

Asher, It doesn't get any better then having you for a son. I can't imagine life without my sweet boy. You are truely a blessing from God more then you will ever know. You are a miracle, there is something so special and different about having a little boy that I just love. You have the most gentle, sweet spirit and I know you will have a tender heart just like your daddy's. You are as cute as they come with your big blue eyes and curly dark hair! You have the best laugh in the world and it's so infectious. Even when mommy isn't in the best of moods and doesn't want to laugh, when you laugh I can't help but laugh right along with you. You can look at me and say something so simple like "hi mommy" or "thank you mommy" like after I change your diaper and it just melts my heart. You are full of energy, giggles and wonder. You love choo choo trains, airplanes, balls and woo woo cars (police cars). You also love music and love to sing and know lots of songs just like your sister. You amaze me sometimes when I hear you and you are actually singing the words and the melody pretty darn good! A couple of your favorites you sing right now are the happy birthday song and Santa Claus is coming to town! Daddy taught you how to beat box into a microphone and Aunt Shelly taught you how to do the robot, which are two of the funniest things I have ever seen. I love how you still need mommy to hold and cuddle you when you wake up or when you are upset, because I know that won't last forever! I love having a son and even more so I love that it's you. I love you sweet Asher!

Lilly- a symbol of innocence and purity as well as beauty...

Lilly, I can't even begin to tell you how thankful I am for you. I prayed for my Lilly and had you named for 8 years knowing that the Lord had promised you to me. You are more beautiful then I could have ever imagined, inside and out and I know that will continue to grow with time. Where did this blonde haired blue eyed girl come from! You are so girly in every way. You love babydolls, makeup (already), playing with your kitchen, dancing (and you have got some moves!). You even have a cute little high pitched girly voice and a tiny girly frame to go along with it. You have a mind of your own and like to let us all know. You give the best hugs and when you do I don't want to let go. You are so smart and your talking more and more each day. Sometimes you will say something and mommy and daddy are amazed and wonder how on earth you learned it! You are not only saying words now, you are putting them together and actually talking in sentences! A couple of examples that blew me away are: Mommy was getting you out of the car and hit her head on the door and said "ouch". You said, "awww, mommy are you ok? You hit your head?" I couldn't believe I was answering you back and saying, "yes, Lilly mommy is ok!" Another time I was changing Asher's diaper and he was crying. You bent down to comfort him and stroked his head and said "are you ok sweetheart, don't cry." What a sweetie. You love music and will often say "more lusic, I play guitar". You love to dance and lip sinc to songs, sometimes acting like a brush or a wooden spoon is your guitar. You also love to sing and know quite a few songs. The funniest thing is when you start singing a song mommy and daddy listen to instead of something like Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. You are something else! You are an amazing, sweet little girl and I know God has special plans for you. I'm so happy to be your mommy and even happier that you are my daughter. I love you my Lilly!

First play in the snow

It snowed all day on Wednesday so after the babies nap we went down into the play room and I told them to look out the window at all the snow. Lilly was so excited and started jumping up and down saying "it's snowing , it's snowing"! It was so cute. So I asked them if they wanted to see what snow felt like. I opened the door and told them to touch it and told them it was cold and wet. Lilly was very hesitant and wanted mommy to touch it first, Asher dove right in with both hands of course. I picked some up and put it on Lilly's hand and she giggled. I really had no intentions of taking them out in it because Lilly still needs boots and I wasn't sure where the snow pants were, but I was so excited for them to go out in it so I just found some hand me down boots given to Lilly (not snow boots and they were about 3 sizes too big!) But they worked. I put fleece pants on both of them, gloves, hats and coats and figured I would take them out for a bit. They did more investigating then playing, just walking around watching their boots kick the snow, picking the snow up and watching it stick to their gloves. They wanted mommy to make snowballs, so I did that and let them throw them. I asked them several times if they were cold and wanted to go back in and the answer was NO! Lilly even added "no, I don't like it, I want play in snow". (meaning she doesn't like going back inside). I also told them to try and catch the snowflakes on their tongues. That was really cute! I captured a few great pictures of their experience and can't wait for more! We need to purchase a sled!

Happy birthday my babies! You are 2 now!

It's official we have 2 year old twins now! They have changed so much just since moving to Indiana even. I was looking at pictures and videos the other day of when we first got into this house and couldn't believe it. They changed right before my eyes without me even realizing it. The party was great. Lots of family and friends came to celebrate the day with us! As a matter of fact there were so many people here the kitchen and living room seemed to get smaller and smaller everytime I walked in. They were so cute when everyone gathered around and sang Happy Birthday to them. Lilly was just looking around and Asher was trying not to smile but you could tell he wanted to! Earlier that day he had sang himself to sleep at naptime with the Happy Birthday song, one of his favorites, so he really loved it when everyone sang it to him! Mommy can't imagine doing this every year...I had no idea how much work it is to throw a birthday party! At least I only have to do it once a year. It was a fun day and thanks to all that came and for the gifts as well.

Ringing in the new year (a little early) with Grandma and Papa

Christmas 2008

Well, Christmas is over and it's a brand new year for making some changes in my life and working on some things with the babies I am sort of dreading! One of them being potty training two toddlers. Lilly pretty much knows what going to the potty, instead of in her diaper means. Asher doesn't talk about it as much, but they do both tell us sometimes when they are poopy (as well as when they toot, just so we know) so I guess that is a good start! Another thing I am dreading is breaking them of their pacifiers. I seriously have never seen a baby attached to a pacifier as much as Lilly is. She would keep it in her mouth 24/7, only taking it out to eat, if I would let her. I think I might be dreading that more then potty training! At this point I honestly don't think she would be able to fall asleep without her passy and her blankie both. I am not going to rush either of these issues and give myself the whole year to work on them so I don't stress too much. As far as changes for myself they would include loosing weight, I really hadn't planned on gaining weight after I had the babies, I was supposed to loose! Deepening my relationship with the Lord and being faithful with my quiet times with Him. Read, read and read some more! These are just a few things on the top of my list. Now on to our crazy Christmas...It started with Lilly getting a stomach virus the week before Christmas which we are pretty sure she got from her cousin Evan. The babies and I spent the night with my sister only to have Lilly wake us up at about 4am throwing up! She did that until about 8am and then acted fine the next day. 2 days later Asher got it. We had no idea it was coming, he had been playing the whole day and acting fine and then right before bedtime he crawled up on Brad's lap and started to cry a little. I went and got them both milk to drink before bed and Asher drank it all and about 5 seconds later, up it all came! All over Brad and the couch, we both just sat there in shock and had no idea what to do because there was so much! Ok...enough detail, sorry. So we sat up with Asher until about 2am when he finally fell asleep on Brad's lap. The next day, my sister calls me and her and her husband Tom both have it, then Brad gets it, then me. I didn't have it near as bad as everyone else, never got sick, just felt like I was going to. On to Christmas Eve...Everyone was pretty much over the stomach flu but then Asher woke up Christmas Eve with a nasty cold in which he gave Lilly as well. Oh wait, it's not over!! Christmas morning...I was so excited for the babies to wake up on Christmas morning because I knew this year they were old enough to open presents and be excited. We had wrapped a few presents and left a few sitting out around the tree so they could see them when they first walked in. They usually wake up around 8:30 or 9am, BUT since they were sick, we heard them both crying at 6am, I immediately knew it was not going to be the Christmas morning I had hoped for. We waited to see if they would calm down, but the crying got worse so we just got them up. Two crabby, tired, sick babies, now waking up with pink eye on top of the colds they had. Are you kidding me! So their we were, me, Brad and my mom (she stayed the night to watch the babies open their presents) trying to figure out what to do so the morning's excitement wouldn't be lost. I rocked them for awhile and talked to them about the presents under the tree and how they could open them and about the presents Santa had brought and they slowly came down off my lap to go look. We let them open their gifts and pretty much put them back to bed around 8am. They slept until noon. The day after Christmas we took them to the Dr. for the pink eye and ended up finding out they both also had ear infections and had to get on antibiotics. So their was our Christmas! I am soooo hoping next year will be uuummmm....healthier I guess? I didn't even get any good pictures because I was so stressed and bummed out about all the sickness, but here are a few I can post...sweetness in a box and my little drummer boy. Sorry this blog was so long, I wanted you to get the full effect of how awesome the Beckey Christmas of 2008 was! But what matters most is that God is still God and He is still good despite our yucky couple of weeks. (again, still hoping for a better Christmas in 2009)!

Getting a posed picture of the babies is soooo mucher harder now!

I remember when it used to be so easy to get a picture of the babies sitting side by side, how easy it was to get them both to smile and look at the camera. Of course it was when they weren't mobile! Here are my attempts at getting a picture of the babies sitting in front of the Christmas tree...so much for getting a good picture to send out with Christmas cards!